Separation of twins

I Stayed home with the twins until they were 2, when I went back to work as an RN, part time. I found a great preschool that would take them 3 days a week. I loved, loved, loved it. The only problem is that the director INSISTED that I separate the twins. I didn't think it was good for them to be seperated from their mom, their older brother and their twin all at the same time. Even after I had an appointment with her and showed her all the material and reserch from NOMOTC. She wouldn't budge. Well, neither did I. I put the 4 year old in the preschool and placed the twins in a home day care with "Nan" who had watched my kids since #2 was 2 or 3. So, yes, we took them and picked them up from two different places.

At age 4, I started them in a local MDO twice a week and they continued at Nan's only on the days that I worked. At MDO, they were in the same class per my instructions. I wanted them to begin to get used to the idea of 'school' while they still had their twin with them - getting used to being in a classroom setting, listening to the teacher, following her directions, taking turns and sharing, etc. Also, I felt like I would want to separate in kinder.

As last year went on, I knew that I wanted to separate for kindergarten. Reason # 1. One twin was eager to do the 'work': letter papers, colors, etc. The other twin's paper came back with just a few scribbles on it and nothing else. He preferred to plan rather than learn. All of this *may* have been different with a different teacher, but who knows. Reason #2. They were fighting and very physical. As they have 3 older brothers, this shouldn't have surprised me, but they would have an all out fist fight sometimes. It doesn't help that the big boys (and Dad) 'play' with them by wrestling, twirling them, etc. I told DH that when the kinder teacher called me EVERY day for fighting/aggression, I was directing her to call HIM instead of me. Reason #3. We live in a small town with a tiny 2A school. Each graduating class has somewhere between 50 and 70 in it. I want the kids that they will be going to school with for the next 13 years to know them apart(as well as the teachers). I believe that will start by having one of them in a class so that the other kids can get to know THAT twin. That knowledge will carry over in the years to come.

The twins themselves were divided. One did not want to be separated and the other one wanted to be in a class by himself. We talked to and encouraged them and I had a book about twins starting school (in different classes) to help prepare them.

So now, 3 weeks into school. I am very happy with my decision. They each have their 'own' class, teacher, and friends. They get to see each other once or twice during the day, and they get to have some of the same experiences that they LOVE to compare and "oh and ahh" over. "I did that TOO!!" When they come home, they are spending less time watching TV and more time actually PLAYING with each other; puzzles, games, lincoln logs, coloring, play doh, outside, etc. When they get in the car, all 3 are talking over each other, telling me what they did, what behavior 'score' they got for the day, what centers they did, how lunch was and on and on and on. It's great!! I love to see them playing together and catching up with each other.

Kathina

aka, Queen Bee